It’s hard to even comprehend that it’s been one month since you left me. How am I supposed to just go ahead and get back to normal life when my “normal” for the last 9 months revolved around you. Planning for how our life was going to be as a family of 5. Getting your room ready, clothes washed and sorted by size, bottles and binkies washed, diapers and wipes all stocked. Everything we had been doing was all for you to come home to. Now I sit here and stare at the Christmas trees and decorations that need to come down. I think about how empty these rooms are going to feel when I had spots planned for all of your things. I was so prepared and ready for this life with you and now you’re not here. You were supposed to be our new normal. My ears yearn to hear your cry, the silence is deafening. My eyes wish to see yours, but instead I’m blinded by tears. My arms ache to be holding you, the emptiness feels so heavy. I lost you and lost a part of me forever. Life without you is my new normal and I will never be the same. I love you, my angel, Andelyn.
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